Review: S04 Ep08 No Place Like Home

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Kody showing off his masculinity and a HUGE bald spot!

Let's recap, shall we? In the previous episode, Kody was briefly reunited with his brothers Curtis, Scott and Michael. They rode motorcycles  choppers, shot off some weapons and had dinner at a fancy restaurant. The women folk (you know, those ladies the show is named after) did paint on pottery and made sushi. It was so....uneventful...
And Kody is so....bald!

So what's happening with this episode. Well, for one thing, the four of the elder Brown teens taking a road trip back to the old homestead in Lehi. We'll get to meet another grandmother, Janelle's ex, some uncles and aunts, and oh yes, there's...ALMOST NO KODY BROWN!!!

Yay!! Sounds like episode 8 will be a good one!

After an interminable recap from Kody (of course) about the Brown's run from those pesky law enforcement types just doing their job to serve and protect the law-abiding folks of Lehi,  we watch the teens packing Meri's SUV for the ride back to Utah.

Finally on the road, Logan asks Maddie "What are you going to do [in Utah]...do you have any friends...that will hang out with you?" A confident Maddie answers with "Do I have friends!..." I just LOVE this teen! You know she is going to have some fun!

As they drive up to Grandma Bonnie's house (Meri's mother), we are introduced to new members of the extended Brown family. Grandma Bonnie, who apparently is a great cook. Uncle Marc, Meri's oldest brother. And lots and lots of food being taken out of the oven. "Ah...the food smells so good, Grandma" Hunter says. And all the teens agree...Grandma's are the best cooks!

We then meet Uncle Nathan and Aunt Rebekah ( Meri's sister), but who is that man in the tremendously flowy white shirt? Why, it's none other than Uncle Adam, Meri's brother and Janelle's ex-husband! According to Uncle Adam  "...When they moved to Vegas, I was a little bit shocked...I think for the benefit of the family ...and the safety of the children, it was absolutely the best move they could have ever made..." I was really surprised to see Uncle Adam...I wasn't particularly freaked out by his appearance, but when you try to put your mind around how these kids are related to the adults in their family, well, it can be kind of mind-blowing. But I guess that's par for the course when you're a polygamist.

April Fools!!

Next day, when Mariah refused to answer her phone, Maddie and Logan conspire to play a prank on her. They tell her that Hunter was arrested for curfew violation and underage drinking...and Mariah fell for it!! In fact, Mariah had a bit of a temper tantrum. But just like siblings, Maddie and Logan are laughing so hard they almost hurt themselves! Now this is what we need to see more of - the teenagers acting like teens AND HAVING FUN!

UGGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!
Back in Las Vegas, Robyn holds her first My Sister Wife's Closet meeting. After a few minutes listening to Robyn's pointless banter, it is becoming very apparent that the family is going forward with her business because :

• It's a half baked idea with no business plan other than Robyn thinks it will be fun
• There's one page not even half filled with Robyn's 'jewelry designs'...commonly called DOODLES
• Kody has drunk Robyn's kool-aid, and LIKES IT !!

"That's cute!" says Kody, even though the drawing looks like a child's scratching. "Oh yeah, that's cool" says Christine, apparently still trying to atone for being so mean to Robyn. "This is very trite to me...this is like...oh my gosh, I'm five..." says Janelle, pointing at a particularly childish rendering of the letters SW into a shape.

Leave it to Janelle to call it like she sees it. You can almost hear her thinking to herself 'Kody turned down my Fundamental Fitness business plan for this crap?'

Later in the meeting, Meri and Robyn high five each other when they figure out the SW stands for Strong Women. Which is ironic because its so painfully clear these women are not strong women by any definition. Stupid women, maybe, but not strong women. Oh yeah, My Sister Wife's Closet (whenever it gets online) will really help with that $720,000 down payment!
NOT!!!!

Oh yeah, I want to spend money on this cheap looking stuff!

And to new business partner Brandon, all I can say to you is Run!!! Run like the wind and don't look back!!!

Can we get back to the teenagers, please? Oh no, we can't. It's the obligatory Miniature Golf Time segment.

How can you tell Christine is lying ? Or about to cheat?

Still in Brown LaLaLand, we find the adults taking the children left behind miniature golfing. The most troubling thing we get out of this segment is that Christine is a liar. In fact, according to Kody (who should know a thing or two about lying) she's so good at lying because she actually believes her lies are truths. And she cheats at games, too. Note to Christine: Your reputation is in shreds. Time to get off your high horse and start repairing the damage! NOW!!


Back in Utah, the teens decide to go on a hike and a picnic. Unfortunately, it's 30-40 degrees outside, but, under Logan's lead, they try to have a good time anyway.

Logan learned some valuable life lessons that day. He learned, for instance, that it is always a good idea to check weather forecasts, especially outside temperatures before planning an outing. He also learned it is never a good idea to drop an F-bomb when cameras are recording you. Frankly, as long as he isn't ruining his life doing hard drugs, robbing people or dropping out of school, who cares?

And Christine, for the record, if Janelle understands her child, who are you to say any different? Now, aren't there some sharks you need to protect your own children from, Christine? How about toasters? Or microwaves? AT LEAST LOGAN'S NOT KNOWN FOR BEING A CHEATING LIAR IN HIS FAMILY!

I feel a lot better getting that off my chest!

Back in Lehi, the teens go to the old plyg house. For some reason, we not only see the front of the old house, we also see the back. Notice how each 'apartment' has its own door to the outside in the back of the house. It's also evident that there is plenty of room to expand the old house with another 'wing' for Robyn and her growing brood. Think of how much cheaper it would be!


But the teens know that the chances of their parents returning to the old homestead are next to none. So they tearfully take a look at their old home, and think about the happy memories they will always have.

And so ends episode eight.

Your thoughts?